Since I have no knitting to show besides a half-finished second sleeve, and my sewing mojo has completely left the building, let's talk trashy reality TV shows.
This morning on the treadmill I watched the new show Dating in the Dark. In case you haven't heard about it, they pick three single men and three single women in their late 20s/early 30s(each episode) and over some indeterminate time frame the singles only interact while in a pitch black room.
They go on a group date first to see who they click with just out of the group, then the producers tell them who their compatibility match would be based on questionnaires and profiles completed prior to the show. They then spend the majority of their "dating in the dark" time with this compatibility match, though they can still "free date" by choosing to spend time with the other two singles of the opposite sex (at this point - I'm sure there'll eventually be a gay episode, but at this point it's all hetero.)
So anyway, after a certain amount of time of "dating", they then do a "big reveal" by getting each "couple" in the darkroom, shining a light on the individuals one by one, but neither person is allowed to say anything. Then after seeing what their potential partner looks like, they have to individually decide whether they want to see the other person again after the show. They do this by either showing up on the terrace where the other "half" of the couple is (maybe) waiting, or leaving the house alone. On this episode, two of the three couples chose to see each other again. I really felt bad for the one guy that got rejected as he seemed like a nice person.
The stereotyping is really bad though - I'd say they pick one "very attractive", one "nice looking, average" and one (perceived) "not so attractive" person for each of the sexes. The thing is, there's always something attractive about everyone (in my mind) and no one was unattractive enough to discard them just based on looks. At least to me. The very attractive girl ended up with the average guy and chose to see each other after the show, the very attractive guy ended up with the "not so attractive" girl and chose to see her after the show, though he said he had some misgivings (jerk) and I found it ironic that the "average" girl rejected the "not so attractive" guy (who wasn't ugly by any means - he just kind of looked like a younger Bill Murray) based solely on his looks. But she wasn't any great beauty or anything!
In my single years, I was never someone that dated based on looks - in fact, I got a lot of grief because of it because people thought I should be more picky on that criterion. I just find personality way more attractive than traditional good looks. The few times that I was with someone who was "considered to be" very good looking, it ended up being a total trainwreck. So I am very very dubious about using looks as a sole criteria for relationship potential. Chemistry and a connection, absolutely!! That is key and a must-have, and the average girl/not-so-great looking guy in the episode had that in their darkroom adventures (they kissed and said they had a connection and shared a lot of stories about their lives/families) so I couldn't understand why the girl didn't want to pursue it. I guess this show is meant to illustrate how people make bad choices in who they choose to date! Or from a more cynical perspective, maybe it's scripted and the producers tell them what decision they have to make.
That show has got to be a major blow to the self esteem. What if YOU think you're the very attractive one, and they label you as the average one? LOL. Then you get the boot because your match doesn't like your looks. Ouch!
Posted by: Jenny | July 21, 2009 at 09:00 AM
I agree with your sentiments! I had a friend in college who would set me up on blind dates with the best looking guys. The minute they would open their mouths, the evening would go downhill! What's worse is that the very same people who date based only on looks, often choose their spouse the same way then they end up divorced inside of a year! I often wonder what, besides money, motivates people to actually appear on those shows!
Posted by: kozykitty | July 21, 2009 at 09:04 AM
I am hooked on this show now. I am addicted to seeing how other people respond and behave. It is an eye opener for sure. I think the average girl was a jerk. I just dont get the kissing thing and then the ewww on her part. Im glad the English fellow chose her personality and character in the end. They better do follow ups. lol
Posted by: Machelle | July 21, 2009 at 12:58 PM
Tell me about stereotypes! But over the years I learned something: goodlook can attrackts me (shoot me!) but can not keeps me beside! At the end (unless you are totaly empty haeded) if there is nothing more in someone but look - buy, buy!
BTW, I always had akward taste when it comes to man (hairy ones, beer belly ...)
Posted by: sandra | July 21, 2009 at 01:51 PM
DAmn - I meant bye, bye, not buy buy!
Posted by: sandra | July 21, 2009 at 01:53 PM
Do they really honestly think they'll meet someone worth knowing on a show like this, or does everyone know it's a joke?
Posted by: Debby | July 21, 2009 at 06:15 PM
I so wondered about that show! Now I need to watch. I am so with you - I was the same way as you in college. I was so dis-interested in many of the attractive guys because of their egos. It is really about personality, how they are on the inside and how they treat you that matters.
I loved this post, BTW. It was so off your normal topics and I loved it.
Posted by: Lara | July 21, 2009 at 10:57 PM
These trash tv shows are hilarious and sad at the same time. Generally, I find I don't like the ones that either want you to do something humiliating (like on Survivor)or ARE humiliating like these dating shows. That said, it's an interesting idea, but we don't get that one up here. My current favorites are the Top Model shows, Hells' Kitchen, Top Chef etc types.
Posted by: Carol | July 22, 2009 at 11:00 AM
see what I'm missing out on by not watching reality tv? ;-) I always feel so uncomfortable for the people on them that I usually cant watch
Posted by: rogue2408 | July 26, 2009 at 06:05 PM
That's a very interesting analysis, and I've never seen the show. Would you believe I just saw What Not to Wear for the first time Friday night? And when I was at the Nationals Softball tournament last week with DD#2, I saw some lame show with 5 girls and 3 guys. The guys and girls had to rate each other separately on the beauty of their faces, their boobs, and lingerie outfit. If the girls and guys ratings matched, they got more money. So trivial and mundane, it blew my mind!
Posted by: Kat | August 09, 2009 at 08:00 AM
The stereotyping is really bad though - I'd say they pick one "very attractive", one "nice looking, average" and one (perceived) "not so attractive" person for each of the sexes - I think beauty really is in the eye of the beholder.
Anyway, do they still play this show? I think I did catch it once.
Posted by: Teen Dating Advice | January 10, 2010 at 09:51 AM